A Fork In The Road

• Resistance and the spiritual path
• The naughty child within
• In 2015 we stand at a fork in the road

This article is for everyone who has ever felt “I wonder why I’m not meditating (or whatever) like I should, or not getting on with my purpose and passion, and why I sometimes don’t remotely even feel like it.  There’s sometimes even that feeling of “I just don’t friggin’ want to, and nobody can make me,” or, “why bother, it’s no use anyway.”  We know what helps but we don’t want to do it, or we put it off again and again. Why shoot our self in the foot like that?

We may not realize resistance can show up big time on the spiritual path.  There is, within us, still that which works against us.  If we know that, it’s easier to take things in hand. 

Soldiering on sometimes means telling our inner procrastinator – or the toddler tantrum thrower within – “It doesn’t matter if you don’t want to or not.  I’m getting up off this couch, dumping the cookies in the trash, and doing something life-affirming this minute!”

2015 has us at a fork in the road.  There’s a lot of chaos around us and this creates choppy seas.  The inner troublemaker may want to escape, hide, party or fight a lot more. Lots more TV, fantasy and other forms of personal resistance and escapism.

This doesn’t mean I ignore resistance, anger or fear. That’s actually another form of escapism. It means recognizing them, and then making another choice.

When I fell into an escapist day recently, it was binge watching The Good Wife on Netflix.  I let one episode lead to another then another and after hours of it I felt, well, CRAPPY.  And “the kid” was pitching a fit to watch more: you work hard, you deserve it; everyone else is doing it, you’re such a prissy killjoy!  LOL.

I had to take things in hand, realizing, “Today I’ve had a feeling of unease and I’m escape-binging on TV.  It’s shutting me down. In truth, I feel icky.  No excuses, I’m stopping now!”  I picked up a book that nurtures and lifts. After a chapter of Autobiography of a Yogi, I was back on track.  The tension left my stomach, the feeling of dread departed, my head cleared and the initial unease was relieved, too.  It was a course correction. 

The fork in the road is this: there’s one choice we make that will lift us.  The other path is the one where we allow the resistance to go unchecked. Cranky and angry at our self and others, we indulge in fright or flight behaviors.

The two paths used to be closer together; we could wander back and forth between them and get away with it.  Things have changed; the two paths no longer cross and converge.  These two roads have now branched in widely different directions.

The first path deepens our connection to our goals and lives, to soul. The second fork cuts us off from those.  With so much chaos in the system, we can no longer afford to indulge in the second path, it quickly takes us down.

So what do we do about that trouble making resistor in us?  I came across an excerpt in one of Alice Walker’s books that will take us the rest of the way on that.  Her character, Kate, is with a shaman and a number of strangers intent on healing.

The shaman explains about the resistor in a terrific way.  It’s a good book and I highly recommend it, but for now enjoy the short excerpt; it has a great Aha! built in.

I’ll see you next week with thoughts about 2015 and healing, as I finish the series on health that we’ve been sharing together.

Much love,

Ma HuLiLi

An excerpt from Alice Walker’s novel

Now Is The Time To Open Your Hear

… Armando had told them all many times: It is hard to believe, but there is something inside of you, no matter how sick and fed up with your sickness you are, that does not want you to heal. It will actually fight you. Sometimes I think of it as a small boy, he said, and laughed. He is there having a good time at your expense and if you get well he worries there will be nothing left to do. No games to play with your sick body, no games to play with your mind. And this little boy will have to be negotiated. It was one of Armando’s favorite words.

He will have to be negotiated, just like you would talk to a lawyer. If I am well, you must tell him, there will actually be lots more for you to do. More games for you to play, because we will be much stronger. If we are much stronger, we can go more places. We can have more fun. He is an odd little boy, this part of yourself that wants to control you. And sometimes we are all charmed by him. That is why sometimes people who are not very sick will suddenly die. They have listened to his voice too long. It is very seductive.”

From:  Now Is The Time To Open Your Heart, by Alice Walker